A New Year

More pre-blog posts.

PREVIOUSLY INKED...

January 12, 2011 5:24 pm

I don’t make new years resolutions.  I do, however, make commitments to do something new in my life.  Last year I knew I wanted to be married and have a baby.  I prayed, fasted and waited on God.  I did not know how God was going to fix the relationship I had nearly ruined, but I trusted him to do just that.  And being the God He is, He did.  I married the love of my life and we became pregnant within weeks of saying “I do.” 

This year I am making a commitment to trust God, period.  I find that as I move through life I try to manage my own life a little too much.  Okay, that’s a pretty way of saying I try to control every aspect of my life to the point of exhaustion.  My husband has tried to tell me this on many occasions.  Now, I believe him.  Life is so fleeting.  This year I’m going to keep moving forward with what I believe God wants me to do and leave the outcome to Him.  Wow, I think I just lost 10 pounds!  My shoulders have even relaxed! 

I am also going to remember, honor and go after my previous dreams and revelations.  After getting married, I really felt at a lost as to how to be a wife and still engage in all the things I used to do pre-marriage.  Balancing this new role in my life left me feeling really anxious because I had no idea what my husband expected from me.  Now that we have had many “discussions” ;) on the topic, I think I have a pretty good understanding of what he needs from me.  I feel much more confident in our relationship with this knowledge.  I can now concentrate on my first love…my relationship with my creator, without guilt.  I don’t know if any other women have experienced this, but my husband used to want me home and seem bothered by my busy schedule.  I would feel so guilty leaving him to go do ministry.  I felt conflicted.  It came to the point where I asked God to just give me some time.  Actually, it was an internal knowing that God was giving me some time to adjust.  I so thank Him for that time.  He loves me.

So, I have so many pursuits!  First, I wanted to start a blog and here it is.  It’s kind of scary jotting down your thoughts and knowing others will read them.  I mean they might judge you harshly for them and who wants that??  It’s too late for that right, no turning back now.  You know what, turn back?  I don’t really want to.

Peace be with you...