A pre-blog post.
PREVIOUSLY INKED...
January 8, 2011 8:25 pm
Isaac is feeling better today. He has his very first cold. According to the doc, I’ve “done a good job” taking care of him. I must admit, it makes me feel good to hear the doc say those words. I haven’t felt like I’ve been doing such a good job in his first weeks of life outside the womb.
It has been really hard for me to find a rhythm. I have so many people that offer their support and words of wisdom. I do appreciate their kindness it’s just that sometimes it makes me feel worse. My mothering instincts don’t seem to know what to do sometimes and talking about it just plain sucks.
I finally told my husband and mother-in-law how I was feeling. They both just looked at me. Does that mean they agree? Am I a sucky new mom? I wish they had said something like, “you’re doing a good job.” They didn’t. I guess I’ll just have to keep doing what I’m doing. Isaac seems content when he’s not screaming at the top of his lungs. What should my barometer be? How will I know if I’m doing a good job? Should Isaac or other people’s opinions be the deciding factor? For now, I’m going to go with Isaac. I think he’s a happy baby most times. And, I think I have something to do with that.
Peace be with you...
I don't think it matters how good of a mom you are, at the beginning, NO ONE KNOWS ANYTHING! :-) I remember having that very same feeling. I don't know if you remember me telling you this, but I've always known I was going to be a mom and I always wanted to. But when I was actually faced with that little bundle of joy, I had NO idea what to do and you're exactly right, others' words were no help. Not that this is of any consequence, but I have total and complete faith that you will be/are an excellent mother. Isaac is blessed to have you.
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